Cheekymonkey
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Time to go - 2007/02/27 07:40
Always thought and said i would never leave my kids but after months/years of arguing and general unhappiness that was effecting the children I decided/was pushed to leave my Wife and 3 kids, 7, 4 and 2.
I am 34 been married for 11 years, been off work with depression for about 3 months, half way through a bankruptcy, have a disciplinary pending that could result in my dismissal. Only now since i left my wife am I starting to get my head / life sorted out.
I left on a Sunday and my wife told me she contacted the CAB, and the council on the Monday set up new bank account and has in place all the single parent benefits.
When together my wife looked after house and children and i went out to work, i work away from home 4 -5 days a week, thing is now i am no longer there should i
1. Continue paying everything leaving me with about ?200 a month to live on if so i can’t get a house, i am currently staying with friends 300 miles away from the kids but won’t be able to do this for long so i need to think about how i can live and move near the children as I want to see them. My wife want’s my office cleared so that the room can be used as a bedroom so I have loads of stuff that I need to get out of the house before she does the inevitable and bins the lot.
2. Stop paying everything. If so i am concerned the kids will suffer and i do not want that.
I want to be able to get a house that the kids can stay in but if i am paying for my wife to live in the family home then i can’t do anything/move forward.
I am not sure if i can get help with housing and if so where, my wife refuses to tell me how much benefits etc. she is getting so i don’t know if she is getting more than 200 a month.
I am going to visit the local CAB office for advice but is this worth it or should I just go straight to a divorce lawyer?
I want everything to be nice/mutual but am I just being na?ve? I imagine when guys split with no other circumstances i.e. none of us have done the dirty they want/think things will be talked about and agree to the changes that need to be made. Problem is my wife has a lot of help on this matter:
1. Her best friend works in a CAB office and she has gone through the divorce with kids involved before.
2. Her sister has recently split and is near the end of the divorce stuff.
3. Her father has plenty contacts in the law business and plenty money to help her out if required.
And I have sod all help due to me moving to her area with her family 10 years ago and working away all the time so been unable to make friends etc. I am totally on my own with this.
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